A good and hard day

EC wise, today was great! I noticed today that she is telling me she needs to potty by giving a little fuss and then waits for me to put her on the potty. It's like she is saying, "Hey mom, i need to potty." Then gives me time to put her on the pot then she goes immediately! And sometime I don't get her on that quickly if I am busy but she still waits. Before it was more of a, "Hey I am about to pee"...couple of seconds later she is peeing. I only missed one pee today!!! And I caught the poop explosion! Woo Hoo! Very Exciting! And the pee that I missed she was totally telling me but I wasn't paying attention until I felt her wetness! I might be able to ditch the diapers even sooner than I thought.

The hard part of my day was trying to still figure out the back carrying. I tried a different kind of hold today but still had issues and then I just got really frustrated. You know that frustration where you either want to throw the object that won't work or cry, or both? I had both! (I didn't want to throw Sammy! I wanted to throw the wrap) I was so upset and I even got upset with Sammy for trying to wriggle around. So I stopped, laid her down and went to do dishes alone so I could cool off. Then I came back and apologized to Sammy for my frustration. It threw me off the rest of the day because I was just so bummed about not being able to get her on comfortably for the both of us. I know that I just have to keep practicing and eventually it will become second nature, just like breastfeeding. I just can't wait for that time. Thankfully a wonderful lady from http://wrapyourbaby.com/ gave me some advice about wrapping and the width of my wrap. I made mine myself by just buying 6 yards of Muslin Cotton and dying it purple. The original website that I was going off of said 45 in wide would be good, but I noticed that from videos no one else's wraps are that wide! So tonight I am going to trim down my wrap and see if that will help us. I'll let you know how it goes!

The Good, The Bad, and the Not so Pretty...

Her 2 month picture!!!

Sammy is now 2 months!!! I can't believe it. Technically she will be 10 weeks tomorrow! She is growing so stinking fast! Her little personality is blooming a little more each day and I love watching it.

The Good...
Sammy's bladder is getting bigger. She isn't going pee nearly as much anymore which is lovely since I am Infant Potty Training! I didn't realize how often she went until she slowed down! She is also not having poop farts like she up until a few weeks ago. Almost every time I would check her diaper she would have little skid marks from farting. But now she is better able to control her sphincter so poop only comes out when she lets it. And she is getting so good at cuing and holding it until i can get her on the potty! A couple of times she has even stopped mid-stream when I say "stop, wait!!!" and will finish once I get her on the potty. She definitely knows that pee and poop go in the potty. I don't even really cue her anymore to go unless we are out in public and on a toilet that isn't normal for her. She just knows to go by the position she is in I guess. All this is good news for me and our laundry bill! When I am home all day with her, we usually can use the same diaper the whole day!

It's still hard when we go out. We started using G-diapers for going out because they wick away the moisture so she isn't sitting in urine! Usually you don't want this when potty training because you want the baby or child to feel the uncomfortableness of being wet. But when we go out I am not always able to potty or change her right away when she needs it and I would hate for her to get a rash because of it. Unfortunately, Samantha is growing so fast the G-diapers just aren't really fitting anymore and we don't have the next size up.But thanks to her growing bladder she may not need the G-diapers soon anyways.

My goal is to have her out of diapers by 9 months and into trainers. A lot of babes that are EC'd full time can be. Actually I have heard that it makes it easier because you can't depend on the diapers anymore. So we shall see where we are at at that point, but that is where we are heading.

Finally got her in the back carry in our woven wrap.

This isn't about EC, but recently I have been learning how to put her in a back wrap. I usually wear her at least once a day while I do chores around the house or go walking but until now I have been wearing her in the front. This makes some chores somewhat difficult since she can be in my way. I have been afraid to try to carry her on my back but I finally tried it out. It was very frustrating at first! I almost quit a couple of times but I have succeeded a few times as well which gives me confidence to keep trying. If you baby wear I highly recommend getting or making a woven wrap and/or a mei tai. I have a Moby which is awesome as well but it gets so hot that I can't keep her in too long. Also, stretchy wraps can only be worn until the baby is big enough to wiggle around a lot because at that point they could flip themselves out. Woven wraps are much stronger for older children and are cooler. I'm not sure how long you can wear with a Mei Tai but they are even cooler than the woven wrap. I will try to take a picture of her in the Mei Tai. I actually made it from the instructions on http://www.grumblesandgrunts.com/2010/10/how-to-sew-mei-tai-baby-carrier.html.

The Bad...
We still are missing almost every time at night. I am just not waking up fast enough either by accident or on purpose. What can I say I really like to sleep! And when I hear her start to wake up I know if I shush her back to sleep I can get at least another half hour before she really wakes up. But then that means I miss her pees! Its actually pretty silly that I do that because if I just got up right away and peed her she would have a dry diaper so I wouldn't have to try and fumble my way through changing out the prefold. And I could then feed her and get back to sleep. But instead I chose to sort of wake up, shush her, kind of sleep for another half hour then have to get up anyways, really wake up to change out the prefold, then feed and go back to sleep. But try knocking some sense into my half conscious self! So I keep trying!!!

The not so pretty....         Warning*** if you don't want to see breast fed baby poop don't scroll down!***



Now that Sammy is getting older she isn't pooping everyday anymore. So every other day I am waiting for a poop bomb to arrive and hoping to catch it! But the first couple of times I missed! This is one of the reasons i am potty training her! Because I really really really did not like cleaning this off her! Blah! The first time it happened she was sitting in her Bumbo while I was sewing the Mei Tai. She gave a cue but I was concentrating and didn't react right away. OOPS! Then i heard deployment...Yuck! I quickly pulled her out in hoped that I could catch some of it but this is what I found!!!

I was so shocked and didn't know what to do! Then she wiggled her feet and hands into it! I wiped her hands then ran to the bath, and sprayed her down! You would have thought that was the end of the poop for the day but it wasn't! Later we went to my brother-in-law's softball game and she had another blow out! All over her pajamas!!! That was a nightmare to clean up because I couldn't just throw her in the bath that time! Needless to say I am trying much harder to listen for the poo cue because I really hate wiping poo out of all those cracks and crevices she has!!! It is music to my ears to hear the sound of those poop bombs going off in the potty! Never thought I'd be so excited about someone pooping in the potty!

Please dont Deify me!

**So I want to preface this post by saying I genuinely don't want to sound 

 like I secretly want your praises by saying that I don't want them. 

Also I am not saying that everyone should do exactly everything that I do or the way I do it.

 I am saying to figure out what really is best for you and your family and do it.

Many have said many great things to me recently about what I am doing with Samantha, and while I appreciate the encouragement I want to also make clear that I don't want to appear as though I have everything figured out and I am somehow a supermom. Our pastor and good friend Brion recently just said that when people see you doing something "extraordinary" they will deify you in order to justify themselves for not doing what you are doing. People will say or think things like, "Well your baby is just extra sweet." or "I couldn't do that because I have this kind of child or these things to do or these problems with my husband". And while I honestly don't think that everyone is doing this I do want to confront those who  might be and tell you that what I am doing is completely possible for you to do... its even pretty easy once you can get over your fleshly self.

While I have always wanted to be a mom I didn't come to do what I do naturally. The Lord has been showing so many truths to me for the past few years, biblical truths and practical. Once I got one revelation I wanted more. I want to know what is true and right and best for my family, AND I wont make excuses to not do what is best. I realized during my first trimester when I was exhausted and I just want to sleep all day that I would rather die young and exhausted having poured my life out for the Lord, my husband, and my children than to die old, complacent, boring and with no good fruit of my labors. So I CHOSE to pursue truth and then follow it. I researched and still do about tons of things. Food, drugs, vaccines, EC, birth, pregnancy, child training, marriage, etc. Once I learn about something I try to apply it. It isn't always an automatic switch but I purpose myself to change.

I am no different than anyone else. God didn't give me extra grace to do these things. At least none that I didn't ask for. I made purposeful decisions to figure out what was and is good for my family and then I followed through. My point in this post is to tell everyone that you can do and have what I have. Work on your character so that you aren't lazy and complacent and do it! If you want to potty train your baby, awesome do it. Research it. Learn about it. Ask questions. If you want an amazing birth, do it! You want an awesome marriage read the word and obey it! You want to know how to parent, read the word and obey it! And watch people who have great kids! Learn from them. Ask them questions!!!

I am sinful! So sinful! I am lazy and apathetic. I was not born with a propensity to go out of my way to learn things. If I followed my flesh I would have an average American life, marriage, family. Probably even worse. The point of this blog is to be an information source to someone who is searching, like other blogs were to me. Not to be the entertainment for people who will read this and do nothing.Therefore, please do not deify me. Please please please do not say that I am different and somehow better than you because of what I do. I need the same amount of Jesus' blood to cover my sins as you do.

My Birth Story

My due date, exactly 2 weeks before she was born!

3 weeks before I was due I began having some contractions that were more intense than the braxton hicks I had been having for months. I thought I would be going into labor soon. Weeks went by until my due date sadly passed while I continued having. Then I developed a horrible pregnancy rash called PUPPP. It covered my entire body except for my face. Nothing I did would make it better. I was miserable. At my 41 week midwife appointment my birth assistant put me on a diet to try to minimize the itchiness and it helped tremendously! But I was still very pregnant and ready for my baby to come! We started using black and blue cohosh tinctures to help stimulate my contractions.

 March 19, Chris and I went to our midwife's (Renee) house for her to put primrose oil directly on my cervix. While doing so she checked me and I was 6 cm and 100% effaced! We were very shocked that my uterus had done that much work and I wasn't even in labor yet. So we went home and tried to go to sleep. Almost immediately after laying down contractions began and they were good ones. I tried sleeping but eventually they became so painful that I had to move through them and obviously couldn't do that in bed. So we got up at about midnight and started working through my contractions. Renee came around 2:30 and then Rebekah and Kim (student midwife and birth assistant) came around 3:00. My favorite way of working through the contractions was to stand and put my arms around Chris' shoulders and moan. It was like we were dancing. I felt so close to him and I soaked up his strength! My contractions were strong but they would speed up then slow way down. Hours went by and the midwives decided to go home to rest and give us a chance to rest as well. I tried finding a good spot in bed to lie down in between contractions but everything hurt my back. The position I finally could find minutes of rest on was on my knees leaning on the birth ball with my bum up against the wall. My sense of time was completely gone! I was shocked when the sun began to rise because it had only felt like a couple of hours since labor had begun.

Chris and I got up, ate breakfast and tried going for a walk. I could only make it down our alley because it was so cold and I didn't feel comfortable moaning outside. The midwives returned and I kept on laboring. I felt good and was enjoying labor. I joked between contractions and then focused when they would come. But they were still pretty irregular. They would get down to 2 minutes or less apart and then would space back out to 10-20 minutes apart.The midwives went for a walk and let us labor alone. When they returned we were all determined to get this labor going. I was about 8 cm and my bag of waters was bulging. We wanted them to break so I would get into different positions during contractions and try popping it with my breaths. It wasn't working. The bag kept bulging further but still wouldn't break so they had me lie down and push during contractions. That's when things began to get intense.

I somewhat liked the pushing then because it felt different than the contractions but it also wore me out pretty quickly. Finally it broke!  I was checked again and I was 9cm with a tiny lip of cervix still in the way. My contractions were so very intense after that. I couldn't find any position that felt good. And my back was killing me! Sometimes it felt good if Chris pushed on it and others it was horrible. I felt like a deer in the headlights sometimes. When the contractions would begin all I knew was that what I was doing hurt and I had to move but I had no idea where to move to. I asked to get into the bath tub thinking that would help my back but it didn't.

This is when I hit my wall. Because I wanted to be a midwife  I have read tons of birth stories and almost every woman describes a point in their labor where they have to decide to let their bodies go and give into the pain. I tried preparing myself mentally for this moment, knowing that the quicker I could give in the better. I was trying so hard to give in to the pain but it was so difficult. In the bath I started crying and telling Chris about what I was feeling about giving in. He was so helpful the entire time! He was there at every moment encouraging me and supporting me in whatever way I needed him to. My midwives came in to offer some additional support and I asked if I was in transition.When they said yes I was very encouraged because that meant birth wasn't too far away. They had me change my breathing to blow the pain away instead of moaning which helped tremendously and they had me squeeze the pain into their hands.

Then it was time to get things moving. We decided to go ahead and let them try to hold the cervix out of the way to let the baby's head come down. They had my lie on the bed again and push during contractions while one of them would try to move my cervix. This part is a little blurry to me and all the moments run together. It went by so fast to me. I was pushing which at this point felt amazing. It still hurt but it was a different pain. It was an active pain from the stretching instead of the contraction. I remember in between contractions being so relaxed and almost in another world. Then the contraction would come and I would push with everything inside me.

I wanted to change positions because I didn't like the idea of being on my back but Renee wanted the baby to come down to a certain point before moving. At one point Renee had me open my eyes and focus on her which was actually really hard to do. I was in such a different place that trying to focus on the outside was near impossible. It was like trying to stay awake when you are exhausted and your eyes just won't stay open. Then she had me tell my baby that everything was okay. Later, she told me that the reason she did this was because Samantha's heart rate was low and she wanted me to breathe and calm the baby.

She started having me breathe through every other contraction to help her get more oxygen but then my body started pushing for me and there was no stopping. That was probably my favorite feeling of the whole experience. Feeling my body take over in pushing her out without any help from me was exciting! I still didn't think that she would be out soon. In my head I kept wondering when I would be able to get up and change positions. Then all of a sudden everyone was yelling (remember I was so deep into my head that I didn't hear a lot of what was going on around me.) I didn't know why everyone was yelling but I kept pushing with everything I had in me! Everything burned like crazy! At first I hesitated because I wanted the burning to stop but I remembered that I had to push through it to make it stop. There is no turning back. Then they placed Sammy on my chest!

 I thought I was dreaming for a second! I thought I still had hours to go! I was so excited that my baby was finally here! I can't remember if she cried right away or not. I just remember her wet slimy body on me. I loved it! She was born at 6:20 pm on March 20 after 18 hours of labor! I literally thought it felt like 4 hours! It went by so fast to me! I tore in two places but there weren't very deep. Only one needed stitches. Getting stitched was not fun at all! I could feel them stitching me because the medicine wasn't working. So I sang to Samantha to try to keep my mind of the pain. She loved it! Then we snuggled into bed as a family.

They cleaned everything up and Kim made us dinner. Samantha weighed in at 8 pounds 9 ounces and was 20 1/2 inches long. She was so beautiful to me! She nursed within her first hour. Her grandmas came over for a quick visit then we nestled in to our bed together. I barely slept that first night! I was way to high too sleep! Chris put her in his arm so I could sleep for a couple of hours. She caressed his beard the while time and he fell in love!

Day 3, we went on our first walk.

Attitude

Notice her middle finger!

The other day I was working on sewing a new mei tai wrap for Sammy and I can't do so while holding her. So I put her in her Bumbo for the first time. She doesn't have perfect head control but she can hold her head up for a while so I placed her in front of me so she could watch what I was doing... but this wasn't good enough for little Sammy. She wasn't having it and decided to tell me all about it. She threw her first fit! It was pretty funny to watch. I know some people don't believe in letting your children cry especially at such a young age, but I do. It was very evident that she was just pissed that I wasn't holding her. She has recently started doing that. But this wasn't just a way of communicating her want this was a cry that was to make her desires known in a very selfish way! I could see that oh so lovely selfish flesh rising up in her yelling at me, "You will serve me and my desires or you will pay." Fortunately I am not so easily swayed, plus I love her way too much to let that rule me. So instead of picking her up... I took pictures.

Chris keeps saying that the Lord equates us like babies which makes me laugh. Its true! We freak out and think the world is caving in in us while God knows it isn't and that we are just fine. That's why I can laugh at my beautiful naive daughter who thinks that she MUST be held in that moment. I know that she is fine and there is absolutely nothing wrong. She was fed, dry, awake, and happy until she was placed in the Bumbo. So I let her cry and continued on with my sewing until she became happy again. Then I picked her up and snuggled her! I love my daughter very much and will train her in the way she should go so that when she is older she will not depart from truth.

My 7 week old is trying to crawl!!!

She started out in the middle of her blanket!

So Sammy seemed like she had some gas she needed to get out so I put her on the floor for some tummy time. She has army crawled a whole foot so far! She has got her legs going and even gets on her knees occasionally. And she is barely scooting with her arms but its getting her moving! I don't know why she thinks she is so big!!! SLOW DOWN! I am not ready for her to grow up yet!!!

Cloth Wipes

Here are my flannel wipes. Super easy to make!

I wanted to mention cloth wipes to anyone interested in cloth diapering or ECing. Originally I intended to use cloth wipes in our cloth/EC usage but it turned out not to be too practical for us. I know other people who EC that use them and love them but they just didn't work for us. And here's why:

Because we potty Sammy we usually don't have too much to wipe since most of everything goes into the toilet and not all over her bum and in her deep rolls! So when I started using our cloth wipes I realized that they were almost a waste of laundry. And then I would have a dry diaper but would have to get up to put the wipe in the wet bag. If the diaper was dirty I wouldn't be making any extra trips but its annoying to get up to put one barely used wipe in a bag across the room many many times a day if I don't have to.

However I love the idea of using cloth wipes along with the diapers. I'm cheap! I made my wipes and I think they are pretty cute! Honestly I would probably try to find a way to make the wipes work if my husband really wanted me to but he likes our system the way it is and doesn't mind spending the little extra money for disposable wipes every week.

To make them I just cut out flannel squares of fabric and hemmed the edges. Then for a wipe solution I made my own out of water, tiny bit of tea tree oil, Aloe Vera, and Castile soap. I just looked up the recipe for it. But I actually like using just water best. I didn't like having the smell of the solution on my hands after using the wipes. Then I saved on old wipes container but about a cup in there and let the wipes soak in the solution. I have heard of some people actually utilizing a wipe warmer so its not so cold on baby's bum. Then for traveling I used my peri bottle from birth to spritz the wipe before using.

So now with our disposable wipes we keep an old wipes container with no lid near her baby potty to throw the used ones in and empty it when we empty her potty. This system works great for us! If anyone wants my cloth wipes that lives near me let me know!

Logistics

This is her first time being on the potty! And she went right away!

 So I thought I would describe a little bit about how we do this whole potty training business in case anyone is interested in trying or just curious. For the first 4 days after she was born we would cue her with a "psst" sound every time we knew she was going potty. Since she was wearing a disposable diaper we didn't get to cue her very often but did when we could. Then when we first started actually giving her opportunities they were mostly based off of timing. Babies don't usually pee or poo in their sleep so they most often need to immediately after waking up...just like we do! So every time she woke up I would put her on her toilet. And almost every time (unless I was too late) she would pee or poop! It was amazing! Each time she went we would make our cue sound to establish the meaning of the sound. She learned very quickly what it meant. Once we began ECing we also began putting her in cloth diapers so we could tell when she was eliminating and could cue her quickly.

Daddy's first time holding her while she goes.

After a couple of days of watching her and pottying after her waking up I started to pick up on her own cues. Babies know when they need to potty contrary to what some doctors will tell you. They feel the urge to release just like we do and can even control the sphincter to hold it (just not as long as we can). Sammy gets grunty when she needs to go and will grunt almost every single time! There are only rare occasions where I don't hear her grunting but it could just be that I didn't hear. Another thing she does is when she is feeding if she is wet or needs to pee she will lick my nipple instead of eating. This was frustrating to me before I figured out why she does this but now that I know its an easy fix.

Currently this is our routine; During most days I keep her in a prefold with a snappi or just bare bum with a prefold under her. I also keep a fleece blanket under her at all time because it is mostly waterproof as long as she doesn't sit on it for a long time. We don't particularly like getting peed on so this keeps us dry. (Although there have been a few times where I felt daring and held her without it...then regretted that decision.) I try to pay attention to the noises she is making throughout the day to listen for her grunts but sometimes I miss them or don't have enough time to react but we catch most everyday. If I am busy and I know that I won't be able to hear her I will put a cover on.

Another interesting note is that most babies won't potty when they are being worn in a carrier or in a car seat. So when I wear her in my wrap I usually keep her in just a prefold without a cover unless I am going to keep her in the wrap for a long time. Then I put a cover on her and try to give her a break to potty.

When we go out in public that's when things get tricky. I have always put a cover on her when we go out because I really don't want pee to get on her car seat. I try to always give her the opportunity to potty before we leave the house. I have hear other moms do this and also when they take their babies out of the car seat since that's when the babies will usually go. But I either forget to do this or don't want to wake her if she is sleeping. Then there is the issue of public bathrooms. If a bathroom doesn't have a changing station I have to set up shop on the floor which is disgusting to me! But I have tried doing it in my arms and that's a disaster. I take off her diaper and cover and then hold her in my arms over the toilet. She does her thing and then I put the hopefully dry diaper back on. Or put on a clean one if necessary. We keep a wet bag in the diaper bag to bring dirty diapers home. If the bathroom is a one toilet room I will hold her over the sink which is much easier on my back. When we are out at someone's house I sit on their toilet backwards and hold her in my arms.

These shirts are perfect for ECing so that we don't have to keep unsnapping a onesie.

I do keep a Tupperware in the car to potty her in there if necessary but we don't use it very often because I don't like it. There is a type of travel size potty that's supposed to fit nicely between your legs that I want but can't get right now. If we are near some grass and not any nosy onlookers I will sometimes potty her over the grass.

Then for our nighttime routine that can differ as well. It really depends on when you ask me! Last week we were keeping her in just a prefold and placing a flannel blanket under her so that we don't have to change the sheets if we miss. But I kept not waking up in time and missing over and over again so I started putting her back in a cover again. Ironically now that I have been doing that I have been waking up and catching almost all the pees in the night! Oh well.

So there are the logistics to what we do.